Answers at the End of the Road
by Mac1
Summary: When tragedy strikes Mac's life, the one man who promised to be with her forever, isn't the one she needs.


Title: Answers at the End of the Road  
Author: Mac  
Story: short story  
Summary: When tragedy strikes Mac's life, the one man who promised to be with her forever, isn't the one she needs.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own JAG or its characters. They all belong to DB and CBS. 'Somewhere Down the Road' was written by Amy Grant and Wayne Kirkpatrick, copyright 1997, album: "Behind the Eyes", and sung by Amy Grant.  
  
Author's note: I want to thank everyone that has kept my family in their thoughts and prayers. This story is dedicated to my great-uncle Otho, a WWII Air Force vet and the happiest man I have ever had the pleasure of meeting; he had a smile for everyone.  
  
Thanks to my beta readers, Laura and Stacey.  
  
**********  
  
The gunshots rang in my ears. I still cannot believe he's gone. I wanted to see him before, but now; now it's too late. The doctors assured me that he went peacefully, but I wanted to talk with him, wanted to thank him for getting my head on straight.  
  
I'm back at the site now. It's been two days since I buried him; two days since I said goodbye. Every song I hear on the radio reminds me of him. Mic has done his best to be there for me, but he doesn't know how. He didn't know Uncle Matt, in fact there's not much that he really knows about my past.  
  
The arms came from behind me. I don't jump or attack the person behind me. I knew he would show up as soon as he heard the news. I had left a message for him at the office, I didn't want to risk talking with Renee. For as long as I care to remember Harm has been my anchor, one of the rocks I could lean on no matter the problem.  
  
We didn't need any words, we never had. He just held me as I shed my first tears. We just stood there in silence for several minutes. Finally I wiped my eyes and he led me to his SUV and began to drive away from the graveyard. I turned on the radio looking for something to fill the silence.  
  
**********  
So much pain and no good reason why  
You've cried until the tears run dry  
And nothing here can make you understand  
The one thing that you hold so dear  
Is slipping from your hands  
And you say  
  
Why, why, why  
Does it go this way  
Why, why, why  
And all I can say is  
  
Somewhere down the road  
There'll be answers to the questions  
Somewhere down the road  
Though we cannot see it now  
Somewhere down the road  
You will find mighty arms reaching for you  
And they will hold the answers at the end of the road  
  
Yesterday I thought I'd seen it all  
I thought I'd climbed the highest wall  
Now I see the learning never ends  
And all I know to do is keep on walking  
Walking 'round the bend, saying  
  
Why, why, why  
Does it go this way  
Why, why, why  
And all I can say is  
  
Somewhere down the road  
There'll be answers to the questions  
Somewhere down the road  
Though we cannot see it now  
Somewhere down the road  
You will find mighty arms reaching for you  
And they will hold the answers at the end of the road  
  
Why, why, why  
Does it go this way  
Why, why, why  
And all I can say is  
All I know to say now  
  
Somewhere down the road  
There'll be answers to the questions  
Somewhere down the road  
Though we cannot see it now  
Somewhere down the road  
You will find mighty arms reaching for you  
And they will hold the answers at the end of the road  
  
Ooh, they will hold the answers at the end of the road  
**********  
  
I held my tears for as long as I could, but by the end of the song I couldn't hold them in any longer. Harm pulled over to the side of the road and gathered me into his arms. We must have sat there for ten minutes at least.  
  
"Do you want to talk, Mac?"  
  
"Not right now. But thank you."  
  
"I'm here anytime you want to."  
  
After a couple minutes, I decided that we needed to move. "Harm, let's get some food."  
  
"Sure. Where to?"  
  
"I don't know... whatever we come across first." Five minutes later we arrived at a Country Kitchen. We sat down at the table and just talked about everything. For the first time in a week I felt at peace. The next hour was spent eating and talking. For the rest of the day I felt like nothing could hurt me. Harm took me back to my car and when we parted at the cemetery, we made plans to go for a morning jog the next day.  
  
This was the start of the healing processes and the rest of my life.  
  



End file.
